This is one of the last pictures I took in Ireland before we left.
I had no idea what was about to come into my world when we returned.
Change, heartache, and grief were just around the corner,
piling up on top of the heartache I was already trying to stay above,
like a wave that comes when you are already drowning.
Some of it was just too difficult to put into words.
Not all of it - there were many happy days
and reasons to rejoice as well!
But I couldn't sit down and get the words out -
and I got stuck.
I couldn't move past and just skip over the death that came
to my world.
Somehow it seemed "wrong" or "dishonoring" to not write a memorial
post and just move on to other life events.
So here I am, six months later, still picking up the pieces of life
as another wave hits.
But the world events unfolding now are definitely something I want to have recorded.
Its a therapy I need.
So, I will plod on now and try to record current events combined
with past days that are too sweet to be missed.
Life is bittersweet.
Great joys can come even in the midst of deep pain,
blurring it out for just a moment. The pain doesn't go away,
but the joy kind of envelops it for a moment making it easier to bear.
I'm trying to learn to let the joy wash over me without feeling
guilty. Life is filled with both, and we are meant to embrace the joy
and endure the pain simultaneously.
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